Unlikely Rebel: A Church Girl's Journey out of Shoulds and Shame, by Kelli Gotthardt
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Unlikely Rebel: A Church Girl's Journey out of Shoulds and Shame, by Kelli Gotthardt
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No formulas, no pat answers. Just real life. Real questions. Real transformation.
Approach many women in the church and if they’re being honest, they’ll tell you they • try hard to keep it all together; • are frustrated that being good doesn't deliver the perfect life; • feel trapped in expectations; • make decisions based on "shoulds"; • feel selfish when they say no; and • are uncertain of their place in God's kingdom.
Between the desire to please God, the need to feel valued, and the compulsion to make everyone around them happy, women often find themselves denying their desires. It's safer to stay in the life of "shoulds"―even if it means being spiritually and emotionally disconnected.
Kelli Gotthardt knows their pain. Always considered a "good girl," she threw herself into every ministry, saying yes to every request her church family made. On the outside, her life looked completely together―but she was drowning in self-doubt and shame. Unlikely Rebel is the story of how Kelly slowly shed shoulds and shame, learning to love God and love who He created her to be.
The journey from the comfort of doing everything expected of a perfect pastor's wife to the uncertainty of living authentically and true to her unique calling is equal parts exhausting and exhilarating. Many Christians condemned her, responding with fear or anger to her greater intimacy with God's calling when it didn’t match their own vision. For others, though, her journey inspired courage to embrace God's path for their own lives.
Now Kelli invites other women to discover God's leading in their lives, learning that if they throw off the despondency of undeserved shame, abundant life awaits.
Unlikely Rebel: A Church Girl's Journey out of Shoulds and Shame, by Kelli Gotthardt- Amazon Sales Rank: #1250900 in Books
- Published on: 2015-09-27
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 8.40" h x .60" w x 5.40" l, .50 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 160 pages
About the Author Kelli Gotthardt is a pastor’s wife, international speaker, and, leadership consultant in Santa Cruz, California. She holds a master’s degree in spiritual formation, and works as a ministry consultant with Missio. To learn more, visit her website at www.kelligotthardt.com.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful. Unlikely REbel: A Church Girl's Journey Out Of Shoulds And Shame By Amazon Customer My Thoughts On The Book: As a pastor's wife and pastor myself I have to admit I was drawn to the book from the moment I saw the title. This book could easily have been my own story. I grew up in a household with parents who believed you went to church every Wednesday night, Sunday am and Sunday pm. I was more active in church than I was at school. Church was my life. I was always in the lime light because my parents were leaders in the church we attended so I always had to be good. I had a low self-esteem as a child and so the need to be in every activity, choir, and group was my main goal. I wanted to be validated and church was where I got that. I believed you could never say no...because if you did....you would lose your talent. So I sang in all three choirs and New Dawn. I was terrified that if I ever turned down something I would lose my voice. I didn't marry a pastor. I married Frank....and after a dream about being poor at seminary he told me that God had been calling him for years.....so I became a pastors wife. Believe me...being a pastor's wife is not easy. I did not want to let God down so I never said no to anything. The book deals with a number of topics that are not usually discussed and she offers insight into the way to come to the light out of the darkness. I would recommend this book to any woman's book study group because it deals with topics that most of the time get pushed under the rug. Loved it!Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this e-book free from Kregel Publications as part of their Book Review Blogger Programs. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.” Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful. It's Ok To Say No By Deana I loved the transparency that the author displays throughout the book. After marrying her husband Richard, it seemed like she was propelled into every ministry possible. She said, "Every Sunday our worth was measured by how many people showed up at our meetings. Every event was a gauge of our leadership and spiritual effectiveness, and other churches were viewed as competition." I can relate to that statement very well . It seems like churches are competing against each other and sometimes the congregations are told not to speak to other churches because it would show disloyalty to the pastor.Like many of us, the author found it hard to say no to ministries and soon found herself overwhelmed and spiraling out of control. Her willingness to share about her depression was very helpful. Many people think that a pastor's wife has it all together. You are held almost on a pedestal and constantly being watched . There are people just waiting for you to stumble. As she describes the incident on the beach, I laid the book down for a minute. For any of us who have been sexually abused, we are always quick to blame ourselves. We learn to not trust and continue to find approval from others. I felt like I was reading my own story and all the pain and hurt surfaced to the top. Then I read this ," The scars of my past were quickly loosening their grip on my life."As soon as I saw this book being offered to review, I knew this book was for me. I grew up as a pastor's kid and later I became extremely involved in church. I wanted people to like me and help everywhere I could. I soon became the Children's pastor and then my downfall came. I was so overwhelmed with everything, I couldn't find my way . This book has been an inspiration to me and has encouraged me to continue to say no and feel ok about it.Thank you for writing a book that has opened my eyes to lies that I have been told, and to empower me to seek God, love myself and know that I don't need anyone's approval. The only approval I seek is God. You have given me a new beginning and I feel free to let go of the past and move forward where God wants me to be."Let the redeemed of the Lord tell their story." Psalm 107:2I received a copy of this book from The BookClub Network for an honest review.
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful. Overachievers Unite to scale back! By J4Life5 So many times we do things because we "should" and not necessarily because we are led to do them. I can only imagine that the pressure on her as a pastor's wife was so much more than any pressure that I might experience. However, as a fellow "good girl" I can identify with her in the fact that some of the greatest pressure to perform comes from within and not necessarily from a good place!I enjoyed reading about her journey and especially about the resistance she met from others that didn't understand. It was very inspiring to read about her consciously making the decision to step back and listen. We get so caught up in our day to day responsibilities that it is hard sometimes to be still and just listen!This would be a great book for a woman's group to read together and discuss. Maybe not everyone needs to take the hard-line approach that Gotthardt did, but it would be worthwhile for anyone to take stock of where we stretch ourselves too thin and also what suffers because of it. Every commitment we make has a cost, even if it is the cost of our time and energy. I've made more thoughtful decisions about what I choose to do.The only criticism I have about the book is the organization of it. I would have enjoyed it better if it was more chronological. There was a little bit of looking back in the past in the middle of it. I would have felt a better connection with the author if I had read her backstory and how she got to the place she was at to make the decision to say "no", instead of starting at the beginning of her journey of saying "no" and then looking back at the whys.However, I appreciated her sharing how easily "stuff" crept back in at the conclusion of her year. I could totally identify with how easily it is to say "yes" to one thing, then there is something else, then something else, and the next thing you know you are overtaxed. We can do it all, just not at the same time! Some of us have to constantly be on guard.If you are looking for a book to help free you from the cycle of biting off more than you can chew, check this one out. It doesn't have a lot of instructions, but there is a lot of wisdom in the pages of this book.I received a complimentary copy of this book from Kregel Publications in exchange for my honest review. All opinions are my own.
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